I am here to keep track of my weight loss, through the ups and downs, as well as learn to love and forgive myself along the way. I figure this will keep me accountable and I hope to make friends with others out there in similar situations, together we can keep each other going. I heard somewhere that if you can connect with people you do not know personally that you will stay on track easier, sounds good to me.
So at just about 100-110 pounds overweight I have got a big journey ahead of me but I am going to give it my all. There will be days of discouragement, dislike, anger and any other emotion I can insert here. When I first started the blog I was content with watching calories and exercising. I am not why sure but in the past week I have dug out my weight watchers information and returned to that. I did well with the program and not sure why I gave it up. 😦 Oh well, I can’t cry over spilt milk, it is what it is. One thing I struggled with my weight loss, (I’ve had many starts over the years) I do really well, enjoy it, feel better…but I am not good with compliments. What the heck, that does not sound right. When I hear, “wow you look great” etc I somehow take it as you can stop doing what you are, eat, eat, eat and stop working out. So I fall off the program, gain back what I lost plus more. Why do I do that, I need to figure that out and prep myself for those compliments. Anyone else struggle with compliments?
So my “weigh in” day will be Wednesday morning. I am excited and a little scared for that day. I don’t expect Biggest Loser weigh ins, but I would like to see a decent drop to keep myself on track. I have been digging up all my old quotes I’ve gathered from on-line and WW meetings to keep me going. The big thing I am trying to hold onto is that, I need to break it up to small goals, stay focused, not throw it all away because one day. Many times in past, if I was horrible one day that would turn into two to three to well you get the point. We all are going to have our challenges and I need to ease up on myself. If I have a horrible day, fine pick yourself up and keep going. DON’T GIVE UP!! Also I don’t have to lose 100 pounds, I only need to lose 10 pounds (10 times). It doesn’t seem so scary that way for some reason.
Sometimes you have to face your stuff, dont’ stuff your face.
I don’t know about you, but that speaks so much to me. There are two emotions that I can’t eat, heartache and anxiety. Other than that open mouth and shovel in. Happy, sad, bored, shock, guilt and the list goes on. There are times I am not even hungry and I eat because, well not much else to do. I want to go back to enjoying life. I love to bike, swim, hang out with friends but I often don’t because I am ashamed or lack the energy. I have only been able to white water raft once, but LOVED it and want to do it again….yet I eat instead. I need to treat myself to a rafting weekend to celebrate my 100 pound weight loss. Hmmm I wonder if that can keep me focused. What are your enjoyments that weight keeps you from?
I feel like I have so much to type, yet not much at the same time. I write, I delete, I write I delete. I guess this will all work out as time goes on. Still trying to figure out how I feel about this. I was a little leery about even making a post at first, but figure I tried out for Biggest Loser and that was going to be national tv, so I think a little blog would not be bad. If any of you are out there, let me know and together we shall get through this 🙂 I love to read other blogs to know I am not alone and keep me going so thank you for those who share. Take care and talk to you soon.